Category Archives: Reprint

Adolescent unit

i. (before) Your sorrow    not knowing itself,          just outside of my reach – I want to inhale it    from your bent form,          to siphon the sting and to know – My child born in light    I would sing you to … Continue reading

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You Said Dad Broke Down the Door

I remember the broken latch differently all the times you repeated that story and then you repeated the story             differently rubber mallet floating above his hands raised over spilled milk with the ladder jutting between pool water and my drowning … Continue reading

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a vase of burl wood

unusable unstable rocking on festered mounds I do not flower red poppies, do not hold steady stately roses In the window of a downtown boutique my walls warmed the sunlight lacing through patterns netwing on my weightless side This is … Continue reading

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My Body, Myself

unconscious across the plaza grounds across the grasses clinging to my hem like the children I’ll never have, I drag myself, my eyes focused on nothing—on everything— lamp-hot concrete rasping calloused fingers, the shadow of a man watching as I … Continue reading

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Visiting Grandfather on My Way to New Mexico

you said I was two and I                         blank, grasp at the threads of                                                 reality, learn anew what makes                         a person, what memories build into. on your brown sofa I                         remember another couch                                                 my therapist, it’s not                         a full flashback and … Continue reading

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Mother Musing Over the Daughter’s Doll

my arms the rags of them that flail in winds, you cannot have my legs or the joints, cannot pull me apart at the seams to find my shelled core I fold my heart, tuck it into your sleep can’t … Continue reading

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Mother Musing Over Her Daughter’s Doll

I want to swallow my sewing machine, needle by needle, unbinding the gears, a thimble sticking in my craw, the thread a delicate noose the way I learned sewing was for girls with ribbons in their braids whose button-eyed dolls … Continue reading

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Rolling Home

They flew from Ireland for my brother’s wedding. Hugh packed his wool pants, three pairs of long underwear, three bottles of Jameson’s. Teresa, Granny’s sister, was wee beside him, red-cheeked, gray-haired. We had to lean in to decipher her bubbling … Continue reading

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Bad at Tennis

We had three tennis coaches in one season. Ms. Marmian was retiring, which was fine with us. We called her a cunt behind her back. It was a word we liked throwing around because we liked the weight of it. … Continue reading

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Driving Through the Storm

The sense of “mystery” that permeates so many people’s lives never ever touched mine—experienced only vicariously through my teenage Nancy Drew books—and “magical” was the way I felt, when, as a small child, I held a sparkle-tipped wand bought at … Continue reading

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Mother Talks to 11-Year-Old Self at Bedok Hawker Centre

There is a stall here that is as old as you. It has seen how the concrete rises and falls. An ice palace built and torn apart with the same magic. Yet, they’ve stayed, choosing to dig scoops and scoops … Continue reading

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Violet Chachki: Portrait of a Bothered Queen

At a party in Paris, and all I can think about is how I am going to have to wash my hair and dry clean my clothes because everyone is smokes indoors. Thank God we left. Could you imagine groveling … Continue reading

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A Drop in the Ocean

Raising the bodies on Lesvos Island It is early November 2015. My friend Alison Terry-Evans posts a Facebook photo of volunteers wading into the Aegean Sea to rescue hundreds of terrified refugees packed into a tiny fishing boat that is … Continue reading

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Wan Sun, No Snow

Mere tufts of snow now dot the downed leaves, gleaming like wide mushrooms. Incredible how quickly that total blanketing soaked into extinction. In this most welcome splash of light nothing seems to mourn: the bleak yard, the splayed twigs on … Continue reading

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Decomposition

Even without an audience you’ll fight anything: the last peach rotting in the fruit basket, the dust I leave under the bed and the big dumb December moon. Your jaw unhinges like the snake you ran over on the way … Continue reading

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Giving

Wednesday is an ammonite graveyard, a bleached white cove of stone and chert. Daddy long legs are feeling their way through our camp, where our heater singes the air, a blanket lies half-buried. I count their legs aloud with my … Continue reading

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Whitney

I have never been where the road is a straightaway, not for years— had no intentions to ever go back to where the daffodil-dashed lines end on fatigue, where I left Whitney. Where I left Whitney, her campground of velvet … Continue reading

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A Way Back Home

I teach myself to dress as creeping figs on a sway of fence, how to mourn neon joy leaping over onto my neighbors’ lawn— like a loose gumball, why leopard geckos run inside, leave their tails and die. This is … Continue reading

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Rio Vista

My first memory was rain, movement, drifter feet plying down the roofline in sheets; nothing was separate: the T-frame wires through the spread of distance, the dance of clothespins and the grease trap that once ate a girl. The rain—its … Continue reading

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Retreat

The woman sitting next to Alanna has a jade egg inside her vagina. Alanna knows this because the woman shared that information with the entire group. She shares too much. She is going on about how, sure, the point of … Continue reading

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Propolis

Remembering that day when I held you fast, chest to chest, adhesive beards like Velcro. In the sticky summer air, tiny honeybees flew past. We swore that night that we’d never let go. All that summer, you showed me your … Continue reading

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Ephemerality as Haibang

There, through the car window. The sky a brocade of shimmery dark             velvet. I am nothing more than a moment here. Just today, I ate haibang for the first time in years, the shelled flesh             soft and mushier than I … Continue reading

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nocturne

a plane flies overhead at 2 am and I am struck suddenly by the unexpected disruption, the way it shattered the silence that had settled on my skin in tepid layers. I realize that perhaps the silence was nothing more … Continue reading

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even the shoreline changes

on the nights that sleep eludes me or plays me cool and coy as a cat, the winds in my mind fill my sails and send me across the sea to you. it’s nights like these when stillness shakes my … Continue reading

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Mountains

I’m headed to the mailbox to pick up my sons’ toothbrushes, rapid tests, and my copy of Burying the Mountain. Our house is a mountain, to the layer of fallen snow. The layer of snow is a mountain, to the … Continue reading

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