Tag Archives: Brad Rose

Doug and Cats

Her messages were composed almost entirely of cat photos. Doug hated cats. What good were they in the food chain? Despite his distaste for felines, Doug continued to receive cutesy cat-themed messages from Melvina—almost daily. He wondered how Melvina was … Continue reading

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Benny “Psycho” Whitmore Was At It Again

He didn’t give a damn. It was early morning and there were no pedestrians. So he took two grenades from his son’s toy chest (they looked so real that not even a Special Forces soldier could tell the difference), peeled … Continue reading

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Police Find Man’s Nude Body Crushed Beneath Malibu Mercedes

Every story really ends in the middle, and Bixby knew his would be no different. Except for his new running shoes and white athletic socks, he was completely nude, as he sat in the driver’s seat of his mother’s Ford, … Continue reading

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Death, But You Get Used to It

It’s blank and oblong. Your spray-on tan fades rapidly. You’re thirsty as a Giraffe—all the time. The food is terrible, especially the meat. The funny thing is, you call your dog, and he still comes. For the first time, you … Continue reading

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But What a Lovely Way to Burn

You take the crazy pill, fail to follow Robert’s rules of order. I hunger to edit your mistakes, but before I can, I can’t stop myself from mentally reciting your charms: wrecking yard candy, imposter magician, agonyecstasy actress, electrocution asteroid, glittering diamond … Continue reading

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Blond Ambition

Hunter Goddard realized he needed to change his name. No one—absolutely no one—could be successful in the porn business with a WASPy name like that. His wife suggested, “Power Hips,” but he preferred something a little more ethnic, like “Max … Continue reading

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At the Met

The museum guard watches me as I look at the Degas. Her legs are tired and her face is a sketch of cross-hatch shadows. She is paid a little more than the minimum wage to watch the watchers. It is … Continue reading

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